Don’t Listen

`The voices whisper in the silent night, only covered by the wind blowing by. The poison they sow from the words they speak, the carnage they cause just using plain quiet words, haunts me evermore. Luxury they get from the actions they do, they do not deserve, the enjoyment they get from the torture and suffering, should not be happening. Remorse is not something they know the existence of, disinterested in even learning it. This is advice from the words of the victim. the masks they show are not the real them, the play they put on is simply apart of the plan for their own twisted happiness, they whisper fabrications and slander the words of others. So for the public sake, young and old, suppress the words they may say.`

Healing

Light filters softly 
Brightening a once dark space
Full of tangled thoughts
Hope, optimism replacing
Darkness panic pain despair

Dreaming

I was dreaming

I knew

Because you were there

You were smiling, laughing

I hugged you

Told you how much I missed you

Then I woke up

You were gone

The happy feeling remained

Healing

My Safe Place

Summer evening

Just before dusk

Locusts buzzing

Crickets chirping

Scent of freshly cut hay

Hangs heavy in the air

Red juice stains my fingers

As I pluck the ripe berries

From among the brambles

Dropping into my bucket

The berries make a soft sound

The world has paused

As if holding its breath

Gently exhaling as the sky settles

Into the darkness of night

Numb

the numbness the disconnect don’t feel anything anymore the world feels gray so hard to get through every day not feeling not happy not sad just nothing what is wrong with me will this ever end how do I make it stop

Again

Thought the worst was behind me

But I’ve returned

To the painfully familiar path

Hands numb

Heart pounding

Thoughts racing

Can’t breath

So tired

Of traveling this path

Lost Friend

We were the best of friends. I thought we’d stay that way forever. You were always there for me and I for you. Then something happened. You started slipping away. Growing distant, you left me behind. Confused, sad, angry, and hurt, I moved on.

Twenty years pass. You reach out, wanting to meet. You act like the breach never happened. You were ready to pick up where we left off.

Not so easy for me.

I had questions. Why the fracture? You had no answers, evading my queries with vague excuses. My defenses are up.

I remain uncertain about repairing this friendship. I’m not sure I can. Anxiety and depression makes trusting people hard. How can I rely on someone who has hurt me once before?